Shadows of the Past
by randomangel22
Summary: Confessor Guard Padme Jinn is running away from a past she for so long tried to forget. She's no ordinary girl, she's the daughter of Qui Gon Jinn. Now she must walk down a path towards acceptance with the help of Anakin Skywalker. Major AU
1. Chapter 1

_Note: Mr. Lucas' and Mr. Goodkind's stuff doesn't belong to me._

This story has some new twists that there aren't only Jedi who protect the galaxy but Confessors too. I borrowed this idea from The Sword of Truth series by Terry Goodkind where Confessors have special powers in which when they touch someone and channel their power into them then that person is taken and obeys every command. The person who has been taken under the Confessor's power will think it his/her Mistress (only girls are Confessors) and will confess everything that the Mistress asks of them. Basically they will tell the truth and only the truth. Also a Confessor apprentice is known as a Caharin also from the Mr. Goodkind's books but not the same meaning, an equivolent of a Jedi Knight is a Confessor Guard and the equivolent of a Jedi Master is a Confessor Justice. In my story Confessors don't use lightsabers but use special blasters and they also have an attunement to the Force but they can't use it in the same way as Jedi do. Also the counterpart of a Sith is a Condar. The Jedi Knights are the guardians of peace and justice while the Confessors are the protectors of the justice system and the seekers of truth. I hope you like the story!

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

The Clone Wars have come to an end and the galaxy has been thrown into turmoil with the Sith and Condar ruling the galaxy. The Confessor Order has been almost slaughtered to extinction and the Confessors' Palace next to the Jedi Temple has been destroyed. Now the remaining Confessors must hide in fear while the Jedi must stand helplessly as their duties are stripped of them. Its a race against time for the Chosen One Jedi Master Anakin Skywalker and Confessor Guard Padme Jinn along with the Jedi and remaining Confessors to destroy the Sith and Condar before they destroy them first.

**Chapter 1: The Past Remembered**

Padme's POV

I honestly don't know how I got here really. It seemed like a lifetime ago that I had been living in Coruscant in the Confessors' Palace going on missions and fighting in the war. Yes the war, the Clone Wars. The Clone Wars had lasted for sixteen long, bloody years before they came to end. I can still remember the day they started a lifetime ago and that day would be the day my life would change forever...

Flashback

I was five years old living in the Lake Country on Naboo with my mother, Jobal Naberrie and my grandparents. I had been born on Naboo and it was the only place I had ever been besides Theed, the beautiful Nubian captial. I was no ordinary girl for I was the daughter of the legendary Jedi Master, Qui-Gon Jinn. It was forbidden for the Jedi to love, but my father was different from the rest of the Jedi, I knew that from the years I spent in the Jedi Temple. He was a tall man and had green eyes with dark, long hair that was streaked with gray. He was eccentric so to speak and didn't take precautions. Papa lived his life like he was going to die tomorrow and that's what he always told me. He was the galaxy's greatest father, I mean who else had a Jedi father? My father loved me to death, but yet I never really saw him much growing up for he was always away on missions since his marriage was a secret. My mother on the other hand had dark, long brown curly hair with big brown eyes and was very beautiful who found solace in me when my father was gone. The Mother Confessor always use to say that I looked just like my mother and how it brought her pain to look at me, I knew it did and sometimes I would catch her staring at me and Iwould just close my eyes hoping it would stop the pain. My father was famous in the Jedi Temple and my mother was famous in the many charities she worked in on Naboo. The people loved them for their compassion towards all and they so many goals that had to be fulfilled, yet were left untouched. It was because of me they couldn't fulfill their goals. It was because of me that Papa couldn't join the High Council. It was because of me Mama couldn't teach at the university for the illiterate. It was because of me that they would lose their lives.

I was away at school when my grandparents came to fetch me and brought me home. I didn't understand what was going on but when I saw all the battle droids and the Nubian army assembling I knew that something terrible had happened. War had happened. It happened so fast that no one had time to contemplate before we were drawn into a full scale battle with the Trade Federation and how they blockaded us from everyone else in the galaxy. I remember seeing the once beautiful city of Theed destroyed with bloody, mangled bodies littering the streets and the buildings blown apart. If I think hard enough I can still the stench of death and see it also for I know that it would take me ten lifetimes to cleanse myself of these images.

The Mother Confessor came to my home and she was already waiting there as if someone was going somewhere. Little did I know it was I who was to leave this place. My grandparents had sat me down and told me that I had to leave to protect me and to escape the horrors of what was to come. I didn't want to leave them, how could I? But the Mother Confessor dragged me away saying I was destined to do "great things". Great things? Oh how I rue that day. If I had known those "great things" would be to attempt to kill the girl I called my sister then I would've gladly walked away and never looked back. Yes that's what my mother always told me, never look back, once a decision is made.

I ended up leaving at my grandparents begging, and I left forever. Forever was a long time for a five year old, a real long time. I remembering feeling my eyes were becoming wet but no tears would fall down my cheeks for I couldn't cry because I didn't want to be weak, I had to be strong if I wanted to see my grandparents again. I didn't know when I would see, only that I was going with the Mother Confessor to Coruscant to escape the war. So I sat in my seat and stared out the window one last time before our shuttle took off and tried to remember all the roads we crossed and all the flowers I wouldn't see because I might never come back. That thought alone brought a stab in my heart because I would come back and I would make things right. I would fulfill these so called "great things" the Mother Confessor said I was capable of, but little did I know the difficult path I would have to walk in order to fulfill them. Coruscant would become my new home and I would try to adapt and hope and pray that someday I would be back where I belong. Yes, someday I will find where I belong.


	2. Chapter 2

_Note: Mr. Lucas' and Mr. Goodkind's stuff doesn't belong to me._

**Author's Note: The first few chapters won't have much dialogue as I'm trying to set up the plot. So bear with me please and the action will begin soon!**

**Chapter 2: Remembering Them**

****

End of Flashback

So that's what happened to me so long ago in a nutshell. My name is Padme Jinn former Confessor Guard of the Republic and I'm 23 years old. I was once a Commander of my battalion of Clone troopers in the Clone Wars fighting alongside with the Mother Confessor, my mentor. But that was almost a lifetime ago and long forgotten.

Now I live on the small forest moon of Endor in the Outer Rim as local seamstress in the small town of Endela. Living with me is my new apprentice, Lana Amnell who's 13. She's a tall girl with brown hair and brown eyes. You might be wondering how in the world she became my apprentice. It was in the strangest of circumstances because she already had a master, but sadly she was killed in the Clone Wars and was without one. I took it upon myself to train the young girl for she had a great gift. I knew that someday she would become a great Confessor and would save the galaxy from the evils plaguing it now. But I was a new Confessor Guard at that time and it had been only a few months since I graduated from my apprenticeship. The High Council and especially the Mother Confessor opposed my decision feeling that I wasn't ready. Wasn't ready? I couldn't believe the nerve they had, the nerve the Mother Confessor had and she was my mistress before. How could she not trust me and not have faith in me. It was absurd and I felt angry and betrayed by the woman who I was like the mother I never had.

How could she accuse me of doing things I had never done before? The Mother Confessor thought I wasn't ready for the trials either I mean I saved her life for crying out loud! If it hadn't been for me she wouldn't be alive now and the Confessor Order would need a new Mother Confessor. She was always criticizing me and pointing out my faults more then praising me. I never understood why she did that to me and why she couldn't just love me for who I was instead of what I was destined to do. The Mother Confessor felt as if we were breaking away and our master and apprentice bond had been cut off. Well, of course it had because I didn't want her babysitting me anymore; I could manage on my own. We got into an argument over this and Lana and it became a war in itself between us. I told her how I felt she had been holding me back for so long and that she feared my true potential. I was supposed to be powerful, but it was because of the Mother Confessor that I was so slow and that I had to wait until I was 21 to become a full fledged Confessor Guard when I should've been one at 18. She was jealous and didn't want me to be threat to her power so she held me back. I told her how I knew she blamed me for my parents' death and that she saw me as a burden. The next words that left my mouth would haunt me forever. I told her I hated her. The look on her face was of pure shock and then of hurt, hurt that the girl she raised hated her for holding her back, for protecting her. It looked like she was going to cry and for some reason I felt so stupid for saying that to her. I didn't hate her, but I said it anyways. That was probably the last time I ever saw and I never got a chance to say goodbye or that I'm sorry.

None of my friends even understood what I was going through and how I was slowly being torn apart from the inside out. I was never the great one in the Temple or the Palace. I was the oddball out of all my friends and the quiet one who wanted to be left alone to think things through. I never was really good at anything and I was well, destined to be mediocre compared to everyone else. It felt as if I was just wasting my time training because I wasn't getting anywhere. I found myself spending much of my time in the Confessors' Library or in the Jedi Archives looking up information on anything I could get my hands to pass the time. I always had a hard time trusting people because I had lost so much in my young life that I guess my greatest weakness was the fear of loss. Grand Master Yoda always told me that the fear of loss was a path to the Dark Side and that I must let go of my past. How could he say that? I couldn't let go of my past just like that because it was a part of me and believe me I tried hard to let it go, but it was futile. I would have nightmares of my parents and how I couldn't save them and how everyone looked down on me because they felt it was my fault that they died. I had started my training extremely late compared to the other Padawans and Caharins who began before the age of one, but I wasn't initiated into the Order until I was five. That was considered too old for I had formed attachments with my family and that was against the Code. But the High Council had accepted me because it was the last dying wish of my father and they couldn't disgrace his death like that. My father might have been unorthodox, but he demanded great respect from the Orders.

Sometimes I close my eyes and I see them, all of my friends, the Mother Confessor, Grand Master Yoda and my parents looking at me in shame. What would my parents think of me now, seeing their daughter reduced to a seamstress? They had great hopes for me and believed that one day I would help to rid the evil of the galaxy and that someday we would all live in peace. It feels that their deaths now have been in vain and I had vowed to myself that wouldn't be the case. I had hoped and prayed that someday I would live in that perfect galaxy where there were no wars, no politics or plotting just eternal peace. I wanted nothing more then to be loved and try to forget all the horrible things that had happened to me so long ago. All I ever wanted was Anakin's love, but in the end he didn't find me worthy of it and just left me to live with a broken heart for the rest of my days. I still to this day don't know what had happened between us and he never cared to explain except that it was over. He promised me that he would love me forever and that he would never ever break my heart, but in the end that's what he did. I hate him for that, for betraying me like this and I will never forgive him, never. For my whole life my heart was made of ice and I never let myself get close to people for I feared that they might leave me just like my parents did. But Anakin was different, he made me feel special, made feel that my life was worth living for and that I could forget about everything but him. He was the only one who was able to melt that ice around my heart that was cold as Hoth and make me feel normal. How could he lie to me like and expect me to accept that it was all over? Did he think that our love was game and that he was in control of me and saw me as some lowly, orphan girl who wasn't worthy of his time? Now I must live with a broken heart and hope that someday it will mend, but I doubt that because Anakin was my first and last love and I don't think I could forget him even if I tried.

I've been searching for some peace, but I can't find it. I feel lost more then ever before and I don't know where to go. Lana keeps me in line and comforts when I feel the pain of loss coming through. My only companions are Lana, solitude and my despair. Funny how my life was destroyed in such a short time due to the circumstances by finding out that Palapatine was the Darth Sidious. I still couldn't believe how we didn't see that one coming, it was so obvious now that I think about it and it was pathetic that neither the Jedi nor the Confessors could see that the Chancellor was the menace. But then again I was blind to not see that he had a new apprentice after Darth Tyranus was killed. Probably the ultimate betrayal I felt was at the hands of my dear good friend Saba Salem a fellow Confessor Guard. She was like my sister and why didn't I see the dark whispers she was listening to. I remember she asked me to join the Dark Side with her and I felt at one moment that perhaps I should. I couldn't believe it, but she promised me that she could save the Mother Confessor from certain death because I had been nightmares of her dying. I couldn't lose the Mother Confessor no matter how much I hated her because she was only person who ever took care of me. She was truly the mother I had never had and she took it upon herself to train her dead friends' daughter. Saba offered to help me save the Mother Confessor and could only do it if I joined the Dark Side. I was tempted because I wanted to save her so bad and I feared to lose her, I really did. But at the same time I felt hatred towards the Jedi and the Confessors for not trusting and it was confirmed when Saba told me that they didn't. Why would they trust me when I was dangerous and couldn't control my emotions? My emotions were my greatest weakness and I always let them get in the way of my duty. That wasn't the Confessor way, we were supposed to be emotionless, "A Jedi/Confessor shall not know anger, nor hatred, nor love". That was the mantra I would always chant to myself along with "there is no emotion only peace" and "there is no passion only serenity" as quoted from the Jedi/Confessor Code. Saba led me down a path that no one could follow me to and I almost couldn't turn back. I can't believe that I almost turned to the Dark Side, and it was through the grace of hearing my parents' spirits did I stop and rethink my decision. Saba died that day and was reborn as Darth Xena because I had to fight her. I had to stop her from destroying herself, but she didn't listen to me and we ended up dueling in the Senate Chamber where I was defeated. She not only betrayed me but the entire Confessor Order too by slaughtering them all in the Confessors' Palace. She destroyed my home and my fellow sisters.

In the end Lana and I fled and I found out that the Mother Confessor and my good friend and roommate Katara Jensen managed to survive. It was only us four that did survive and they and the Jedi thought that Lana and I had died in the Great Confessor Purge. That's fine by me because I failed in everything I tried to do. I failed my parents, the Confessors, the Jedi, my friends and mostly myself. I don't deserve to live for my failure, but for some reason I just can't die. I've been wishing for death for a long time now, but I know I can't die because something is supposed to happen. My mother used to always tell me that when it seems that everything seems dark and bleak and that you've lost everything there will always be hope. Hope is something I don't have and can't wait for because I know that for some reason I will live the rest of my life here on Endor with Lana and will die alone and heart broken. I am ready for death and I will face it with what strength I have left because I'm a broken woman now and I have nothing left. Only then will I find peace and I'll be reunited with my parents whom I've missed terribly. Yes, I can't wait until that day comes. But before that happens I intend to remember my life and what went wrong and what went right. This brings me back to the day when I was still a Caharin and the Mother Confessor was coming back from a key battle on Malastre more then two years ago…

**Please leave me reviews if you like the story and let me know if I can make it better! Thanks!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Return**

_Two years ago on Coruscant at the Confessors' Palace…_

I anxiously waited as I saw the Mother Confessor's ship landing with her battalion of Clone Troopers. She had been gone for about two weeks and I was beginning to worry about her and how she would hold up on her own without me there to rescue her sorry behind. I managed a huge smile when I saw her walk down the ramp of her ship searching me out.

"Well, well if it isn't the Mother Confessor back from Malastre," I sarcastically retorted.

"Why hello there my apprentice, I didn't know you were so anxious to see me again," the Mother Confessor jokingly said.

"Aw, come on Mother Confessor you know I was joking around with you. You know that I'm always glad when you come back home." I seriously stated to her.

"So anyhoo, how was the whole affair on Malastre? Were you able to infiltrate the bases or what and might I add without my help this time?"

"I'll have you know, my very young apprentice, I managed quite well on my own thank you very much. If you'll excuse me I have a very important meeting with the High Council to debrief them on the situation."

"Sure, I'll meet you in the cafeteria then to discuss the finer and explicit details you aren't going to indulge me on now," I replied with a giggle.

I watched as the Mother Confessor headed towards the Temple to the High Council chamber while I went to the Confessors' Library to do that stupid research paper on the Mandalorians. I mean honestly who cares about how many freakin wars they fought in? Does it look like I really care? Uh no. Someone really needs to slap the person who came up the curriculum upside the head or something.

As I was heading down to the library I saw Loden Solo, a Jedi Knight who happened to be one of my good friends, working on improving his stupid Jedi Starfighter thinking that someday it'll out fly the Separatists when all it was a piece of bantha crap.

"Loden when are you gonna realize that, uh, maybe that stupid starfighter of yours isn't going to get any better any day soon."

"Well, unlike some people here, and I won't name anyone, cough Padme cough, I wanna see this baby go faster to beat them Separatists."

"Yeah whatever Loden you bum. Continue on with your meaningless life while I continue with mine. See ya around."

I walked in to the library and then low and behold it was the oh-so-great-Hero-With-No-Fear reading up on something random. I quickly walked away from him, not wanting to strike up any sort of aggressive negotiations as that always happened when I was around him. But I was too late in trying to casually walk but run at the same time and he called out to me.

"Padme! Padme! Hold up where are you going?" Anakin asked.

"Uh, I, uh, was trying to catch that, uh, thing over there," I responded dumbly and thinking great now I look like an idiot. Stupid Padme, stupid…

"Umm what thing? I heard the Mother Confessor was back and wanted to talk to her. Have you seen her yet? We need to discuss the next Separatist based to attack and I need to going over some tactics with her…"

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah that's all I heard out of Anakin's mouth. I mean who cares about stupid tactics. Geez this man need to get a life and do something other then find ways to go and save the galaxy every freakin time. He was getting on my last nerves and right about now I wanted to shove his lightsaber down his throat. Ah yes, how nice that would be, but then Grand Master Yoda wouldn't appreciate that and I probably would get whacked in the shins with his stick about a million times. I can hear him now saying, "shove Chosen One's lightsaber down his throat, you should not!"

"I dunno know. Maybe I saw her, maybe I didn't. I mean what do you want with her, Farmboy?" I growled out sounding pissed.

"Geez, Padme take it easy you make it sound like I'm gonna bite your head off," Anakin replied sounding hurt at my Farmboy comment.

"Shut up, Farmboy, I don't know so go find her yourself." And I stalked off muttering Nubian curses at that stupid Farmboy.

For Force's sake why in the world was he asking her! I mean really, Anakin had the worst timing ever, he showed up when she didn't want him to show up and had to ask her stupid questions about stupid things. Sometimes the Farmboy could really rile her up and heck even though it wasn't the Confessor way; she took pleasure out of beating on Skywalker. Oh well, sucks to be him…


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Trouble in Intergalactic History Class**

RING! RING! RING!

"Five more minutes Artoo," I mumbled groggily in my sleep not appreciating the sound of my lovely alarm waking me up at this ungodly hour along with Artoo screaming like some dying bantha.

"Boop beep boop beep beep beep!"

"Force! Artoo shut up!" I retorted and then ungracefully falling off the bed to land flat on my face along with everything on my night table falling on me as well.

And as if I wasn't ready to explode from my ungodly wake up call the Mother Confessor had to walk in and chirp in her stupid high voice, "Padme, goodness girl wake up! It's a lovely morning for some meditation and then katana practice and some more meditation and then…"

Geez, were all masters this annoying! I mean shut up woman! My brain wasn't fully functioning that morning as of yet and then I had to have Artoo to wake me up and then the Mother Confessor who happens to be a very chirpy and dandy morning person. Peachy, just peachy. Couldn't she just let me sleep in for once?

"Mother Confessor, can't I just sleep in for once in my oh-so-exciting life?"

The Mother Confessor just looked at me like a grew another head and transformed into a shaak and explained sweetly as if she was talking to a child, "Padme dear know you know that the earlier we rise then the faster the exercises can be completed and then we can do other fun stuff. Plus it's only 0500."

Was she on crack? Honestly now I think the Mother Confessor was on crack.

I replied hotly, "Only 0500. ONLY 0500! Mother Confessor what part of 0500 do you not understand! Normal people like me value my sleep and waking up at this ungodly hour is quite disturbing in case you didn't know! And what do you mean "fun stuff"! We never do anything fun besides meditate, doing exercises, and some more meditation! I mean are you on crack!" Man was I pissed.

"Well, my _very young apprentice_, you need to get up right now or you will be facing an additional two hours of meditation," the Mother Confessor spat out, her face turning a couple shades of red. Uh-oh I think I'm in trouble…

"So class do you know the exact location of the Sith holocrons that the great Jedi Knight Sibo Karel discovered almost 12,000 years ago?" My teacher Master Olin droned on in his boring monotone voice.

"Ah lets see who'll be my victim today." Immediately all the other Padawans and Caharins put their datapads to cover their faces and apparently I was totally oblivious when this happened.

"Ah, Caharin Jinn, why don't you tell us?" Master Olin snickered taking pleasure out of my burning face. Oh mother bear, mother bear I'm screwed I don't know.

"Umm, ah, see they…came from…you know that big planet…with that thing on it…umm…you know…" I managed to say stupidly while I was twirling one of my brown curls around my finger as I did that when I was nervous. Great Padme now you've officially joined the Stupid Club.

Master Olin clucked his tongue, "Yes, I know Caharin Jinn, but do you know or perhaps you didn't do the homework that was assigned that would tell you that, eh? Perhaps the Mother Confessor would like an update on your progress."

My face burned red knowing full well that it didn't do my homework and knowing that I was in some deep crap now. Crap, crap, crap the Mother Confessor was going to kill me. I'll never hear the end of it. I can see it now a three-hour long lecture on doing homework, which I always do, but last night I was really, really tired and didn't feel like doing it. Why was Master Olin always picking on me? He's a bum that punk…

"Well anyone else care to answer since Caharin Jinn didn't do the assignment? Ah yes Caharin Amnell, please do enlighten us."

"The Sith holocrons were found on Korriban, Master." Lana recited evenly.

"Excellent, Caharin Amnell that's exactly right."

I groaned and mentally slapped myself upside the head. I mean everyone was supposed to know that Korriban was the big and bad Sith hideout. Obviously I never got that memo oops. Well, at least Lana saved my butt from any more utter humiliation.

RING! RING!

"Well, class that's it for today. Next class you'll have a test on what we covered today. Caharin Jinn I want to see you." Master Olin shouted at us and more particularly at me.

Master Olin beckoned me forward saying, "Caharin Jinn I'm quite disappointed that you didn't complete the assignment."

"I'm sorry Master, really. You know I always do my homework, but last night I had an extreme exercise regiment with the Mother Confessor and was…"

"I don't want to hear any of your excuses Caharin! The fact of the matter is that you didn't do the assignment so you will receive an F for the day. Good day Caharin Jinn," he said as if it was something he did everyday. Oh wait yeah he already does that, my bad.

"But Master Olin, I always do the assignments and I need this to save my grade! You can't give me an F for not doing my homework once!" I countered feeling quite ready to duel him with I don't know what since I didn't even know how to use a lightsaber let alone possess one. The odds were against me. Scratch that life was against. Crap double crap.

"Well, Caharin Jinn you should've thought of that when you started to relax last night. I also suggest you show respect to your elders or there will be consequences," he replied back warningly.

"I don't think this is fair Master and don't worry I know who to show respect to and I think if you want it then show some to me," I replied to him evenly dangerous.

Master Olin was turning beet red replying, "Why you little…"

Just then the Mother Confessor walked in to save me, and it was times like this I loved her bad timing which was good right about now.

"Master Olin I think I can handle it from here," she replied authoritatively letting him know where he was on the food chain.

"Mother Confessor I was just reprimanding your insolent Caharin…"

"I think I can handle that myself just fine Master Olin. As far as I know I'm the one training a Caharin unlike yourself who hasn't had a Padawan at all."

Master Olin at that point looked like he was going to blow and man wouldn't I love to see that! Go Mother Confessor, she's the woman! He quickly left the classroom for fear that he might take out his lightsaber and chop me to pieces. I decided now that was a good time to run away out the classroom.

"Hold it right there Caharin Padme Amidala Jinn!" The Mother Confessor retorted and I knew that I was in trouble when she used my full name like that.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"Well, I was…trying to…you know…uh…umm," I mumbled once again for the second time that day. Oh crap, I was in for it now.

"Padme how many times must I tell you to not argue with Master Olin. He's your teacher in this course and you will listen and respect him."

"Yeah well all that would be dandy if he didn't hate me," I countered hotly.

"It is unbecoming for a Jedi or Confessor to hate so get that notion out of your head," she said dangerously.

"Go to your next class and we will finish this discussion when we return to our quarters."

With that and she left and I was left in my stupid Intergalatic History class wondering if the Mother Confessor was going to lecture me for an additional ten hours on respect and all that other bantha fodder. Oh well, looks I better enjoy what freedom I have left. I have a bad feeling about this…


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Run-In With Farmboy**

I walked down the halls of the Jedi Temple looking at the horizon and stopped for a few moments to enjoy the beautiful spring day. Coruscant didn't have much wildlife and it was littered with extremely tall skyscrapers and whizzing speeders and transports in the skies. I thought about what those people were doing and if they were getting ready to get pummeled by their mentor as a certain Caharin was going to face, which made me groan. I started to slam my head against the column hoping that I would be knocked cold and would never wake up to hear the boring five years worth of lecture from the Mother Confessor. As I was trying to knock myself out, I heard that annoying voice again.

"Padme what in the name of Force are you doing!"

I turned around slowly with a my lips set thin and an angry fire burning look in my eyes to see who had disturbed me and I prayed that I was just hearing things. But nooo it was him. That stupid Farmboy!

I responded dangerously, "Well, Farmboy, what do you think I'm doing. I'm trying to put myself out of my misery so I won't ever have to look at your stupid face again and hear that stupid annoying voice of yours either!"

Anakin just made a face and smiled that stupid smirk of his where his lips curled up and where his eyes got that steel blue look in them that freaked me and made me feel very uncomfortable. "Ahh, Padme don't do that. You know how it would make me feel guilty that I was the cause of your death. Not to mention the Mother Confessor would kill me if anything ever happened to you."

"Skywalker get out of my face and go save the galaxy or something. I think I hear your commlink ringing and it's probably the High Council calling you so I gotta go back to class," I managed to say wanting to put as much distance as possible and not hear any lectures from him either but I was already too late.

"Hold it right there Padme! Are you skipping class?" He asked with an angry look in his eyes.

"Uhh…I was you know going…to…uhh…umm," I stumbled out for the third time that day. Man what was it with me and lectures and talking like a freakin bantha on crack.

"Padme, you know that education is very vital to your completion of your apprenticeship and you need to stay focused as well as attend all your classes. Also you need to…"

Uh man, couldn't the stupid Farmboy just shut up! Ahhhh I wanted to rip my hair out of my head right about now! Geez, I already got a lecture from Master Olin then the Mother Confessor and now him! Is there a sign on my back that says, "Please lecture me. I'm dumb as a doorknob." I was getting ready to punch him in the face and believe me it would solve my problems…

"As I said you have to find a way to work out…Padme? Padme! Are you even listening to what I'm saying," Anakin said slowly as if I was dumb or something.

"NO! I didn't hear a single word you said Farmboy. I've got better things to do then listen to your babbling on "duty" and all that other bantha fodder because I get enough of it from the Mother Confessor thank you very much," I spat out pissed at him for lecturing me like some toddler and fixing him with my very best-pissed-off stare and my brown eyes burning through him.

"I'm not lecturing you Padme, believe me I got plenty of lectures from Obi-Wan to last me ten lifetimes and I guess you're right. You're old enough to understand these things."

Old enough who did he think he was! "Excuse me for your information I have happened to grown up you know in case you didn't notice Farmboy. I'm 21-years-old and perfectly capable of handling myself so I don't need you to baby-sit me. I'm outta here I've gotta a class to attend. See ya around."

With that I marched off to my next class, which was Calculus. As I left I didn't catch what Farmboy softly murmured under his breath, too busy being pissed off at him and muttering Nubian curses at him.

"I know Padme. I know you've grown up. Grown up to be a beautiful young woman whom I've admired from afar," Anakin murmured softly under his breath watching Padme walk away with his blue eyes.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: **Someone wanted to know the ages so Padme is 21 and Anakin is 26 in these chapters as the first two chapters are two years later. Hope that's clear!

**Chapter 6: Too Close for Comfort and Surprise**

I quickly ran to my Calculus class as Farmboy had already made me late of course with his bad timing and worthless lectures that he must've picked up from Obi-Wan and the Mother Confessor. I bet he took classes from them on the "Finer Ways to Torture Caharins and Padawans". I tried to run as fast as my small legs would take me with the air ferociously pumping in and out of my lungs gasping to the point of breakdown, but I told my body to go on and not stop as I would receive a detention if I was late. I ran left, right, left, left, right, right, up, up barely dodging Madame Jocasta Nu carting the newest datapads addition to the Jedi Archives and missed spilling them all over the floor. I ran into the class with the bell ringing and knocked over a fellow Padawan who just screamed at me for knocking him over. Well, maybe he should watch where's he's standing as he already saw an incoming flying human racing to her seat. Duh what an idiot. I quickly spotted Lana and sat down next to her out of breath and gasping for some precious oxygen to fill my lungs.

"Whoa, I made it just in time. That was a close one Lana," I gasped out of breath.

"Yeah, Padme next time try getting to class on time. So what happened with Master Olin? What did he say to you?" Lana questioned.

I replied back with a bitter taste in my mouth, "Well he said I wasn't respectful enough and needed to learn my manners and then I told him off, and the Mother Confessor walked in to save my butt. Turns out she has to give me a boring, ten hour long lecture on respect and how Mister Dansy Pants can't hate me as it isn't the Jedi or Confessor way."

"Ooohh, that sucks Padme. I hope she isn't too hard on you besides Master Olin picks on you on purpose and everyone knows that. So don't worry too much about him, he's just a piece of bantha poodoo and he'll find someone else to torture. Eventually," Lana said laughing at my misery.

I gave her my infamous pissed off stare and retorted, "Yah, yah, yah laugh all you want. You're laughing now because Dansy Pants doesn't pick on you. I know he hates me because of my father and I find that really stupid as he's been dead for like, uhhh, sixteen years you know."

"Yeah I could never really figure that one out. Why does he hate your father so much?"

I left it at that as I didn't really want to answer that question because it was a way too complicated answer to explain. Right then another teacher had to bust in ready with a pop quiz on derivatives. Oh mother bear I don't know anything. Oh well looks like I'm gonna fail this one again…

I slowly walked back to my quarters with the Mother Confessor, as I wasn't in much of a rush to get back. Then again I never was, but today I was especially not looking forward to the day's closing. I walked outside to the Room of a Thousand Fountains finding my inner peace there and admiring all the various flowers that bloomed in here year-round due to the Force presence. One flower caught my attention as it was one of the blossoming lotus flowers, my namesake, which was a bright white this time of year and represented purity, strength, courage to stand away from the darkness and to shine through the light. Sometimes I wonder about my name and wonder did I really deserve it, as it wasn't anything that described me. Perhaps my parents were far too overjoyed with the birth of their own child that they overlooked my potential to actual live up to it.

Suddenly I felt the pain in my heart coming through again whenever I thought about my parents. My beloved parents who are no more in this galaxy for they've become one with the Force. It feels as a heavy burden has been placed on my shoulders and I don't know how to fix it and why do I have to be the one to fix it in the first place? I can hear their voices begging me to listen to them, but I won't listen, I can't. It just is too painful and I've gone through a lifetime of pain, which I don't want to live through again, and the last thing I need to be doing is chasing after phantoms that don't even exist. But sometimes I can't help to wonder what would life have been like had they been alive, had I had the love of a mother and the guidance of a father. Sometimes I wonder and I find myself doing that here in the Room of a Thousand Fountains, and I don't know why. Why is it here that I have to remember them or when I go back home to Naboo. So lost deep into my thoughts that I don't hear Grand Master Yoda's gimer stick hitting against the stone path.

"Good evening, young Jinn. Come here why do you?" He questioned with those green eyes burning looking through me knowing full well what I was thinking.

"Nothing Grand Master…I was just thinking about some things, mainly about the war and how we will win it," I softly replied not wanting to strike any conversation about my past.

Grand Master replied back with a smile, "Focus yours is in here and now it should be." I smiled a sad smile, one that betrayed no emotion, yet told him that it was something someone used to tell me long ago in another lifetime.

"Troubling you something is, Caharin Jinn? About your parents it is?" He asked genuinely concerned.

"No Grand Master…umm…I have to meet with the Mother Confessor…uh…good day," I stuttered caught off guard with his forward question.

I quickly ran away from the Grand Master hoping that he wouldn't ask me any more questions that might betray my emotions. Confessors weren't supposed to have emotions, we only had duty, and I intended to follow through with everything that the Confessors and Jedi held dear in their Code. I ran down the long and empty halls of the Confessors' Palace as there weren't many Confessors that existed anymore because we were a revived order that had gone extinct almost 800 years ago during the Great Sith War. The Sith had slaughtered the Confessors to extinction when they couldn't be persuaded to join the Dark Side, and they were an even larger threat then the Jedi. When the order came back into being almost 16 years there were about 10,000 Confessors and now there were only about 2,000 left, and most of them were spread thin across the galaxy along the battle fronts.

It was no joke of the whispers that the Confessors were rare and had abilities that no one could comprehend. There were also whispers that we would go extinct again among the galaxy and I didn't want to believe that because once this war was over then the Confessors would come back stronger then ever and rebuild our war-torn order. People fear us, they fear our power to take control of a person and make them bend to our will. Believe me it frightens me too sometimes when I take someone with my power and have them reduced to a mere slave of the sorts, which I absolutely detest.

I reach the door to our quarters and sigh with frustration and weariness. I don't want to argue with the Mother Confessor and I don't want to say or do anything I'll regret later. So I walked in calm, clearing my mind and Force signature to show my honesty and cooperation for my act in class. I saw the Mother Confessor standing by the window looking out the horizon watching the sun set and the lights of the tall skyscrapers going on to give the planet an eerie glow which earned it the title of the "City of Light" moniker. I walked cautiously towards my mentor in hopes of not disturbing her in her mediation and can feel through our bond her disappointment and frustration at me. I feel dejected and stand still hoping that I can fix the problem and be on good terms with the Mother Confessor.

In what seems like hours, minutes later the Mother Confessor speaks, "Padme what am I going to do with you. What has gotten into you and Master Olin?"

I gulp sheepishly and croak out, "Mother Confessor I'm truly sorry I didn't mean for this to happen and I'll try not to argue with Master Olin and listen to his…"

I was cut off with the sound of the Mother Confessor's commlink beeping.

"Vos here. What's happened," She asked to the other person.

"Melindra the High Council would like you and your apprentice to come to the High Council Chambers. Something has taken place and we need you both here pronto," I heard the voice of Master Windu boom through the commlink.

The Mother Confessor replied, "Of course Master Windu, we'll be there shortly. Over and out."

With that she looked at me and said, "It seems as though this discussion will have to wait as our presence is required in the High Council meeting."

I asked, "Has something bad happened? Are they going to deploy us the Outer Rim?"

"I don't know Padme, I don't know. We'll find out so let's get going."

With that we were off racing towards the High Council Chambers running through the fairly empty halls in the Palace and I only could wonder that something terrible had happened and that could only mean that we were going to be leaving soon. I really hate it when the High Council only gives us vague information and hope that we won't have to leave again and at the same can't wait for some much needed action.


	7. Chapter 7

Hello! Sorry I haven't updated in like 5 million years! This next chapter isn't that exciting as I'm trying to set up from the last chapter, but hopefully the next chapter will be more action packed and roller coaster for sure! Enjoy and thanks once again for reading! I'm on Spring Break for the next week so that'll give me more time to write so yeah!

**Chapter 7: Trouble on Icylian**

The Mother Confessor and I raced down the halls of the Confessors' Palace wanting to quickly report to the High Council Chamber wondering what had happened and if we were going to be deployed to the battlefront. The last time we both had been gone to fight was almost three months ago and afterwards it seemed that the Separatists were losing, but I guess that all changed. As I was contemplating this we had both arrived at the chamber and I ended up bumping into the Mother Confessor earning me a glare that told me to not do anything stupid. Umm, I'm not sure I can be held responsible if I fall flat on my face, but I decided to not voice that out loud as she looked extremely worried, which was starting to freak me out.

We walked into the center of the chamber where the twelve High Council members, with the Mother Confessor taking her seat as a member of the elite twelve. That left me alone and man did I hate being the center of attention with all the Masters and Justices watching my every move and watching every drop of sweat that fell off my forehead or the way my hands were twitching from anxiety. I recognized some of the faces like Mace Windu, Grand Master Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Maya Fisher, obviously the Mother Confessor, and Farmboy. I quickly looked at him and saw those haunting blue eyes staring right through me and I thought I heard a whisper in my head saying, _"Padme I know what you're thinking."_ I just as quickly turn my face away and I see him smirking that stupid smirk of his and my cheeks turning a bright red. Great, sometimes I wonder how did he end up on the High Council at such a young age. He was the youngest member at the age of 26 in the history of the Orders, joining at 23 after he was made a Master for his heroics in the Battle of Korriban.

Master Windu's voice boomed out loud, "As you know the situation in the Outer Rim has become a very great threat to the Republic. Caharin Jinn, you and your mistress will be deployed to the Outer Rim to take care of the dispute on Icylian tomorrow morning at 0600 standard hours."

"We understand, but what is the situation that is so terrible," the Mother Confessor questioned carefully.

"It seems that the local natives are very barbaric and cannibalistic and they have killed the Clone Trooper team we sent earlier last week. We need you two to find out what the Icylians are hiding because they won't let anyone near their base. We have reasons to believe that they are siding with the Separatists and we need to find more information before the Sith find out," Master Mundi replied.

Anakin voiced his opinion, "It seems that the Icylians might be hiding a secret weapon and they don't want to us to find it. We're afraid it might fall into the Separatists' hands and that'll spell trouble for our side. We can't afford to let the Separatists to gain the upper hand when they are so closing to losing."

"Very well, then my apprentice and I will depart in five standard days and we will not fail. We'll find out what's going on and convince them to not betray the Republic," the Mother Confessor retorted convincingly.

Grand Master Yoda replied back, "Then adjourned this meeting is. Find out everything you must to seek the answers to win this war. The Dark Side clouds everything and Icylian in grave danger it is."

I gulped in spite of myself knowing full well that it wasn't going to be a dandy mission, but then again when were any mission we went on anything ordinary. Its not everyday you end up with a bunch of cannibals who are dying to eat you to keep you from telling their secret. With that the meeting was adjourned and the Mother Confessor met with Obi-Wan and Anakin to speak about our mission.

"I have a bad feeling about this Melindra," Obi-Wan cautiously replied.

"I know something doesn't feel right. Icylian is a peaceful world and I never thought the creatures were capable of such monstrosities," the Mother Confessor said.

Anakin retorted, "Not everything is what it seems as before Mother Confessor. You and Padme will need to be on your toes if you're to solve the mystery behind these attacks. The Icylians will try everything to stop you and you can't rely on past references to justify their crimes.

I decided to give my two cents, "Well, maybe the Icylians are trying to protect themselves from invasion and only want to be neutral."

The three of them looked at me like I was stupid or something and then the Mother Confessor had to reply, "No Padme that is not the case and we don't have a clue as to what their motives are and we shouldn't be ones to judge quite yet. I have told you many times before and I'll tell you again don't barge in on your superiors' conversations. You still have much to learn and you will learn your place my very young apprentice."

I blushed a furious red and at that moment I wish I could've run away. I hate when the Mother Confessor totally embarrasses me in front of everyone like this. Just because I'm a Caharin doesn't mean I can't give advice, but no she had to shoot me down. It was at times like this the Mother Confessor really got on my nerves for treating me like a child! I wasn't a child anymore; I'm 21 years old and an adult ready to go out into the galaxy on her own! But no the Mother Confessor thought being 21 was still being a kid and that made me angry. How dare she make me feel so low like dirt!

I felt like yelling at her, but decided against it as it wouldn't be proper and I was already in trouble for my behavior in Master Olin's class earlier. I decided I should keep my mouth shut and just agree with what she's saying this time, but next time we'll see.

I know I'm ready for the trials, but when will the Mother Confessor think I'm ready? She'll probably never think so and if she could have it her way then she'll never let me become a Guard. Great I'm so totally ready to break free from her and live my life fighting off in space against the Separatists. I know it'll happen and I'll be ready and I'll show the Mother Confessor that I'm worthy of the title of Confessor Guard even if it kills me.

Little did I know what awaited us on Icylian and the dangers we'd be put in. But when I did find out I would be wishing that I were anywhere but there hoping we could get out with our lives. The nightmare would begin soon I knew it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: The Haunting and Evil Emerges**

"_Mommy! Mommy! Come back!"_

"_I'm right here my little angel. Don't worry there's little time left, run away, far away and don't come back. Listen to the Mother Confessor; she'll take care of you…"_

"_No mama please don't go! I don't wanna lose you! I don't want things to change; I want things to stay the same as they always were before."_

"_You can't stop the change my little angel, no more then you stop the suns from setting." _

"_No mama don't leave me…don't leave. I need you here. I need you to help me, I don't know how to stop this, make it stop, please please…"_

"_Let me go my sweet angel, let me go…only then I'll be able to leave this place and be with your father. Just let go and everything will be alright…remember that I will watch over you no matter what and also remember to fulfill your destiny. I see great things for you young one…one day you'll make your father and I very proud. I love… "_

"_NOOOO! Mama come back! I love you, please don't leave me by myself! I can't do this, please come back…please, please…"_

I wake up in a cold sweat, tears staining my cheeks, crying that cry that's plagued me for so many years. I still see her…dying that same death, but yet…it's different in the sense that her death is more and more painful and much slower.

I look around to get my bearings and only the darkness greets me after such an uneventful night of sleep. I look around dazed wondering where am I exactly and realize that I'm in my quarters with the Mother Confessor and the sun hasn't risen yet. I glance at the chrono on my nightstand reading 0400 standard hours. I realize that there are still a few hours until we have to depart for Icylian.

I try to go back to sleep pushing my long, damp, brown curls out of my face and trying to stop my heart from hammering so furiously against my chest. The attempt is futile so I get out of bed and slowly walk out of my room to the living room to watch the sun rise.

I watch the massive light coming out of the horizon blazing on top of the buildings that reach the sky and see a new day dawning. I sigh wondering where was my life taking a turn towards and why was I still haunted by those dreams or should I say nightmares. Why couldn't I forget about my mother no matter how hard I tried? Why did she haunt me? I close my eyes and in response I see her face all pale, her lifeless brown eyes rolling back and forth into her head trying to take a look at her surroundings, her limp brown curls bouncing as she tries to talk to me one last time. It's her eyes that haunt me the most with their intensity and how much fear and loss it reflected in her final moments. I still can't figure out why she had to die? She never needed to die like that, if fate hadn't been so cruel to us then maybe my mother would still be here with me and we would be living on Naboo.

"_Stop this Padme! What are you thinking? What would your parents say if they saw you like this thinking about the 'what ifs'? There are no 'what ifs' only what actually happened."_ I realize that I need to focus on the task ahead of me and what I'll be facing on Icylian very soon.

_"Your focus should be in the here and now Padme because your focus determines your reality."_ I hear that phantom voice echo into my head once again for perhaps the millionth time in my life. If I close my eyes I can still see his face with all the worry etched into his forehead and the determination set in his eyes and his loud, booming voice. I quickly open them when I realize that I see images that I don't want to see ever again. I get lost in those memories of when things were right and I had a family, a mother and father who loved me along with my grandparents. I can still see my mother smile her all too rare smiles that were forever wiped from existence the day she died…

"Padme? Padme? Are you alright dear?" I hear the Mother Confessor ask me in a concerned voice.

I reply shakingly, "Yeah…I'm fine Mother Confessor. Is something wrong?"

"No…I just heard you come down here and decided to come down here to see if you were alright. I heard you…you had another nightmare and wanted to see if you were okay. I know its difficult to see them again in your…"

I quickly cut her off and lie, "Mother Confessor I'm alright. I just couldn't fall sleep as I'm pretty excited about this mission you know."

The Mother Confessor didn't look to convinced and pressed further, "Padme, I understand its not easy to lose the ones you love, but you must understand that I'm here for you…always. You know you can talk to me anytime you want to and I might not be able to fix it, but I can promise that I'll listen."

"Thanks Mother Confessor. I appreciate that, but I don't wanna talk about it. I just wanted to watch the sun rise as it always is soothing to see a new day come again," I replied trying to convince her, but mostly myself which wasn't really working.

The Mother Confessor walks away not fully convinced that Padme was looking okay, but she didn't want to press her as it might result in a barrel of emotions flying everywhere. The last thing she needed was Padme to go out of control as the girl already looked shaken and as white as a ghost. The Mother Confessor decided that she'd ask Padme later during their flight in space to Icylian and help her to overcome these nightmares. _"I promise you Qui-Gon and Jobal I will watch over Padme until my last breath."_

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I walked out with the Mother Confessor to the docking area near the Jedi Temple looking at the various Confessors and Jedi that were already up and ready to being their days filled with training, attending classes, or going to the battlefronts to fight the Separatists. Uhh, the battlefronts to fight. How I hated that with the passion. I wished this stupid war would be over with already. All it did was bring pain and bloodshed to the innocents and it needed to stop.

I walk quietly alongside the Mother Confessor towards the docking area where the transports will be leaving to transport the various beings to different parts of the galaxy. I wonder where some of these beings are going, perhaps to see their parents, or to see a sweetheart they've been separated from the war. I sigh loudly, which earns me a concerned stare from the Mother Confessor.

I quickly look away as to not wanting to explain what's going through my head right now. I adore and love the Mother Confessor even though its forbidden by the Code, but she's like the mother I never had. She took care of me since like the day I was born, and the bond we share is that of a mother and daughter. I know it must've been difficult to raise me since I reminded her of my parents, as the three were best friends.

With all that musing, we arrived at the docking area and Obi-Wan, Anakin, Saba Salem, Katara Jensen, Master Windu, and Master Yoda were awaiting our arrival.

"Good morning Melindra and Padme. I hope the both of you are well rested for this next mission," Obi-Wan replies a little too cheerfully for my liking.

The Mother Confessor equally cheerful replies back, "Yes, thank you Obi-Wan and don't worry we're ready to tackle this situation won't we Padme?"

"Oh yeah, we're ready as we could ever be," I say monotonely.

Everyone looks at me weird wondering what side of the bed I woke up on and where was my sarcastic wit.

Anakin pulls me aside whispering into my ear, "Padme are you alright?"

"What do you think Farmboy? It's freakin 0530 standard hours in the morning, of course I'm not alright! Who wants to wake up at this ungodly hour in the morning?" I retort back viciously.

"Padme I want you to know that the Icylians are dangerous and will do anything to get rid of intruders they feel are endangering them. I want you to be careful while you're out there and watch out for anything unusual."

"Ok, Farmboy I'll make sure I won't piss off any maniac cannibals. Why do you care? I can handle myself just fine, and why is everyone all edgy?"

"Padme, I don't think you realize how grave the situation is. Everyone is edgy because Icylians are known for their savage behavior, but we've never seen anything like this before. Just promise me you'll take care of yourself and come back in one piece. I don't think I can bear to see you get hurt. Promise me?" Anakin asks me pleadingly.

I reply back softer then before, "I promise Skywalker. Don't worry I'll try to not do anything you would do which is just about everything." I manage to smile at the last comment to try to convince him that everything was alright.

Anakin looks at me questioningly and I realize that we're too close for comfort and instinctively step back wanting to stop my heart from racing by being so close to him. I couldn't figure out why my heart was racing when I stood next to Anakin, but it was something I couldn't explain. Why did Anakin care so much about what would happen to me on Icylian? It almost seemed like if he cared about me in ways I couldn't even imagine. Nah, I thought it was just friendly talk and Anakin was just my friend nothing more. He was just concerned for his dear friend and wanted to give me some moral support for this mission. I smiled inwardly at this as this was the only logical explanation and was grateful that Anakin was there for me when I needed him the most.

"Alright then Padme, I wish the best of luck on your mission. You'll probably be back in a few days and I'll be waiting for you when you return," Anakin told me in a promising voice that made me shiver.

I don't know why, but the way he said seemed like it had a double meaning. Was there truly more to Anakin then I thought? My brain screamed no, but my heart screamed yes. Anakin was my very good friend and I was his and nothing could change that. Nothing.

Another one of my friends Katara Jensen, a Confessor Guard, who had curly red hair and green eyes like the Mother Confessor which sometimes made me wonder if they were related…came towards me to wish me some luck too.

"Well, Padme this is goodbye for now. I hope you do well on your mission and I wish you the best of luck. Please come back home safe and sound," She chokes out looking like she might cry.

"Oh man, Katara don't start crying…again. I'll be back before you can say shaaks will fly," I say jokingly to cheer her up.

"Oh shut up Padme! Leave it to you to say something incredibly stupid like that."

We hug briefly and I turn towards the last person, Saba Salem who has brown hair with gold streaks and green eyes, patiently waiting to talk to me.

"Padme I want to wish you the best of luck on your mission. I know you'll do well as you are an extremely powerful Confessor," Saba praises me.

My cheeks burn red as I reply back, "Thanks Saba, but I don't think I'm that powerful. But I guess I'll see you when I get back."

"Oh but, Padme you underestimate yourself. You're more powerful then you think," Saba says with a bit of darkness behind it, but I ignore it thinking that Saba was anything, but dark.

I walk towards the Mother Confessor as our transport awaits us and I look back towards our fellow comrades and I tell Anakin, Katara, Saba, and Obi-Wan a saying I learned from my mother long ago, "Goodnight guys, but not farewell because we'll see each other again soon."

They laugh at my comment and watch as we both climb up the ramp to get to our cabin. The transport takes off twenty minutes later and soars through the skies of Coruscant as we head off into hyperspace to our next destination.

Meanwhile, after everyone leaves the docking bay Saba's commlink beeps and she picks it up to see who is contacting her.

"Ahh, my apprentice have the Mother Confessor and young Jinn left for Icylian?" The cloaked figure questions.

"Yes, Master everything is set into place. If everything goes accordingly to plan I don't think the Mother Confessor will be coming back alive," Saba answers evilly.

The figure cackles horribly, "Yes, everything is falling into place my young apprentice, and everything will be set straight."

Saba questions, "But what about the loss of Count Dooku, milord? Anakin Skywalker killed him when they rescued the Chancellor from General Grievous, so won't that hurt our oppostion?"

"Count Dooku's death was a necessary cause. Do not fear the Dark Side will prevail and soon I will have a new apprentice, one far younger and more powerful."

Saba thought evilly to herself, _"Yes soon, Padme, very soon."_


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: Lurking Danger**

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Ahh, meditation it seemed so simple when you're trying to clear your mind from all the distractions, yet it was so difficult to concentrate when we were about to head right into dangerous territory.

Or a trap even.

I tried to think about the Icylians and thinking maybe they weren't cannibalistic maniacs and maybe they were just some cute, fuzzy Ewoks who liked to scare people and make them think that they were man-eaters. Okay, maybe that was a little too far fetched, but it was funny to think about to clear the mind.

The Mother Confessor walked into the small living room that was only furnished with two couches and a small table in the middle. The walls were a boring gray color with durasteel everywhere so it wasn't a very exciting environment. She sat down across from me patiently waiting until I acknowledged her presence and sighed loudly. I could hear her rub her eyes from lack of sleep from hearing me screaming last night and comforting me during the early hours of the morning.

Finally I decided to break the silence, "Something the matter Mother Confessor?"

Her emerald green eyes finally found my chocolate brown ones and we locked gazes for about a minute, waiting to see if she would say something.

"Padme I wanted to talk to you about your dreams," and right about then my face turned a terrible shade of white and I couldn't breath dreading where this was going.

"I know you've been plagued by dreams of your past, but you must realize that you must put it behind you," the Mother Confessor explained gently.

I looked away hoping that I wouldn't start to cry, as this was a very touchy subject for me. I didn't want to have this conversation with anyone much less the Mother Confessor. No one really knew what happened all those years ago to my mother except for the Mother Confessor, my grandparents, and I. As for my father everyone knew what happened to the Great Sith Slayer.

He had been famous for killing Darth Maul with the help of Obi-Wan and Anakin before I was even born. I can fancy seeing those three taking on the Sith Apprentice with all their might. Today those three are known to be the best in the Jedi Order on par with Masters Yoda and Windu. I sometimes find it hard to believe that Anakin at the age of five had helped to defeat a Sith, but Obi-Wan had vouched for him as usual. My papa was famous for that and everyone saw him as one of the greatest Jedi.

But against their better judgment, they overlooked the fact that their precious Sith Slayer was doing 'other things'.

He had broken the most sacred rule of the Code.

He had fallen in love and gotten married.

Perhaps if my mother had known the amount of heartache and pain she would have to endure as a result of my father's constant absence from home and ultimate death then she might of never fallen in love with him.

Then again who said love can be avoided.

Then I wouldn't be alive either.

They say love is the most powerful force in the galaxy and that it can even ignite the stars.

But I beg to differ.

In the end, love only brings pain and makes you weak.

In the end, my father lost his life to Count Dooku in a fierce lightsaber duel that he should've won. I'll never forget the look of pain and shock that filled my mother's face when the Mother Confessor had told her of what had happened. I was too young, only five, when he died and the loss didn't affect me until many years later.

But my father's death affected my mother more than anything imaginable.

I can still remember…

"Padme? Padme? Are you listening?" I was suddenly interrupted during my daydreaming by the Mother Confessor's worried voice.

"Yeah…I was…just…never mind," I grumbled not knowing what to say.

"Perhaps it would help if we could talk about it, you know it might help to ease the pain. You've been acting strange since this morning, and I want to talk about it," the Mother Confessor pleadingly asked me.

The truth was that I didn't want to talk about. It was just too painful to think about and that was something that I couldn't deal with. Too many horrible things had happened to me in my young life and I wasn't ready to face that terrible truth yet. My mother's death was too much of a shock to me and sometimes I felt that it wasn't real, that she hadn't really died, that someday she'd walk into the Confessors' Palace healthy and alive again back into my life where she belonged. But, that wasn't the case and she didn't deserve to die the way she did. It was a chapter in my life that I had closed, permanently.

The monitor started to beep, and I got up walking away from the Mother Confessor and didn't catch the look of worry on her face to the cockpit checking all systems making sure that my trusty sidekick R2 didn't do anything to mess up our course.

I saw the planet from above and realized that we were finally here on Icylian and I gulped fearing the worst for some reason. I had a bad feeling that something terrible was going to happen and that I wouldn't be able to stop it. The nagging feeling stayed there and I told my subconscious to calm down that we were on a standard procedure to see what was going on and then we would leave as soon as possible. Hopefully.

Little did I know that the nagging feeling I had wasn't going away anytime soon.

* * *

Anakin walked through the halls of the Jedi Temple, passing by the various statues of previous Jedi that had died valiantly during the Great Sith War almost 800 years ago. He walked up the stairs towards one of the meditation chambers where he was meeting Obi-Wan, Master Windu and Master Yoda. 

"_I wonder why Master Yoda called on us?" _Anakin thought to himself fearing the worse about the loss of one of the Republic bases in the Outer Rim that Obi-Wan and he had spent five months defending.

Anakin speeded up his walking, walking in long strides with his black cloak flowing behind him and his lightsaber hitting against his hip. Finally he came to the meditation hall and felt through the Force in which one the three Jedi were waiting for him.

He felt that it was the third one down the left and quickly ran into the chamber, immediately closing the door. He saw the room's shades had been drawn up allowing the sunlight to pour through and realized that it was probably a discussion about something casual and nothing about meditating through the Force.

Obi-Wan turned around sensing Anakin's presence and saw his concerned face, and smiled hoping that would put Anakin at ease. Masters Yoda and Windu motioned for both Jedi Masters to join them on the vacant cushions.

After both had relaxed on the soft cushions Master Windu spoke, "Master Yoda and I have come to the conclusion that the Dark Side has shifted considerably."

Both Obi-Wan and Anakin looked at each other curiously wondering where this development came from.

Master Yoda continued, "Sense much danger the Mother Confessor and young Jinn are in."

Anakin looked up alarmed and questioned, "Master how is this possible? Is something supposed to happen on Icylian that we can't see?"

"When sensing the future, the Dark Side clouds everything Anakin. Only know that much danger there is for Mother Confessor and Padme," the green Jedi Master wearily replied.

Obi-Wan stroked his beard deep in contemplation and wondered how in the name of the Force the Dark Side was following the two Confessors. He wondered was this a way for Sidious to lure the leader of the Confessors out to strike out at her. After all, Mother Confessor and Padme had both caused considerable damage to the Separatist base on Mon Calamari almost six months ago. But that was six months ago, so what was the Sith Master planning?

Master Windu then glanced at Anakin who was in deep meditation and asked, "Anakin why don't you search out Padme through the Force since you're bond to her is strong. Perhaps we can keep a check on them that way to make sure nothing terrible happens."

"I've been trying that Master, but I can't seem to get through to Padme, as she is blocking me and her mind shields are at maximum," Anakin replied worriedly.

"Hmm, blocking us she is. Still a Caharin she is and not allowed Padme is," Master Yoda retorted surprised that Padme was able to do such a thing for a Caharin. But then again she was Qui-Gon's daughter and the Living Force flowed through her very strongly like her father. He had to admit the girl had much potential and that was dangerous since she was so tuned into the Living Force making her extremely vulnerable to the Sith. It didn't help that she had had emotional attachments to her parents and wasn't able to fully let them go upon initiation into the Confessor Order. Her emotions were her weakness and she relied on them more then her Force instincts, which wasn't becoming for a Confessor.

Master Yoda thought to himself, _"Not good this is for Padme. In grave danger she is."_

* * *

R2 beeped that he had found an abandoned landing pad, and I quickly grabbed the controls to carefully lower the ship down. 

The Mother Confessor sat next to me in the co-pilot's chair activating the cloaking device as to not warn any of the locals that we were there. As soon as the ship landed the Mother Confessor led the way to the ramp and we walked out to Icylian to see our environemt.

Icylian wasn't a beautiful planet, but where we had landed there was lush vegetation everywhere and fields of grassy meadows everywhere. _"Well, it could be worse, like the time the Mother Confessor and I were on Hoth and it was subzero out there. At least it's perfect weather and not blasting cold."_

I looked around and felt through the Force to see if there were any stragglers wandering around and saw that it was quiet.

Too quiet for my liking.

"Well, Padme lets take a look around and see if we can find any clues to the whereabouts of these cannibals," the Mother Confessor spoke after a period of surveillance.

I replied back cautiously, "Okay lets do that."

We started to walk down towards the meadow passing the forested area in hopes of catching a local tribe or something in the open.

For some reason that nagging feeling came back and I couldn't help but feel that something was about to happen.

And it was going to be bad. Real bad.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: The Battle Begins on Icylian**

* * *

****

After the session with the three Jedi Masters, Anakin left quietly, preferring to go to the Jedi Archives to find something to do to ease his mind off of Padme and the Mother Confessor.

He couldn't get his mind off of Padme and couldn't help to see her mangled body lying all alone on Icylian with no one to rescue her or to her whimpering pleas in her final moments.

He suddenly felt that nagging feeling again that he had felt this morning at the docking area when he was talking to Padme about the dangers on Icylian.

It felt as if it was getting stronger and was heading right towards Padme. Anakin started to panic wondering what should he do? Master Yoda had given orders that should wait and to see what was going to happen, but he wasn't one to sit around while Padme was in danger. His bond with Padme was extremely strong since they were younglings when it had first been forged. He could still remember when he first saw Padme that fateful day sixteen years ago and he and Obi-Wan were doing routine checkups in Coruscant's District 42-A. He remembered staring at awe in the sky as a small ship was crash landing into the district and he alerted Obi-Wan…

"Master! Master! Look it's a ship that's crashing right into the 42-A District," ten-year-old Padawan Anakin reported to Obi-Wan.

_Obi-Wan looked up at the sky momentarily glancing away from the huge crates he and Anakin had been hauling towards the freighter transport and saw what the boy was looking at, "By the Force it looks as if its not going to make it. Alright Anakin lets go down to help out those people and take a look to see if there are any survivors."_

_Anakin nodded to his Master and wiped his hands clean off with a rag lying on the crate and quickly caught up with his Master. He was anxious to see who that was as it wasn't everyday that you got to see a burning ship coming into Coruscant like that. It was a time of peace and everything in the galaxy was just right. _

_They kept walking towards the crash site for about twenty minutes and Anakin had to run to keep up with his Master's long strides, at the same time pushing his spiky blond Padawan braid out of the way since it was an unusually hot day. Finally, they came upon the crash site and noticed that the ship wasn't that damaged with only the wing being shot off from some blaster fire._

_Obi-Wan gave Anakin the signal to stand back as he inspected the ship to find the opening button to see if there were any passengers aboard the ship and if they were still alive. Suddenly the ramp opened up and ever so slowly it lowered down and he saw two figures standing at the top. Both were covered in dark cloaks and it appeared that one of the figures was a child judging from the stature. He saw both figures descend towards the ground and when they came into view in front of him he was about to introduce himself when suddenly blaster fire rung out._

_Anakin saw the blaster fire and immediately activated his brillant blue lightsaber as Obi-Wan did too and started to deflect the rapid firing as best they could. It seemed as if the blaster was directly aimed at the two figures and both Jedi realized that they had to protect them._

_Obi-Wan yelled to the tall figure, "Quick run towards the landing pad across the launching towers!"_

_The figure nodded and grabbed the hand of the child and then it was a mad dash to the landing pad where a ship was waiting. The droiids that had started to attack the two figures followed them to the landing pad with both Jedi hot behind their tails. _

_Obi-Wan and Anakin both ran faster then before with help from a Force induced speed to catch up with the hovering droids to stop them from killing the two figures. As they were blocking the blaster fire they saw the tall figure take out a small blaster and started to shoot down the droids with deadly accuracy. Anakin was at amazement to see this mysterious cloaked figure shooting these droids down like there was no tomorrow and like it did this everyday. _

_Obi-Wan slashed left and right hitting each droid with a deathblow, chopping it to pieces and more came in its place after one was killed. He couldn't fathom where these droids came from let alone why they were attacking the two figures. His vibrant blue bladed went through one droid severing its arm and could smell the stench of melting durasteel coming into contact with the searing, hot blade. _

_In what seemed like hours the droids were cut down and both Obi-Wan and Anakin deactivated their lightsabers to see the tall figure breathing heavily and the smaller figure crouching behind a crate trembling in fear. Obi-Wan decided it was a good time as any to see whom these people were and figure why they were being chased by the droids._

"_Hello there, my name is Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi and this is my apprentice Padawan Anakin Skywalker. We mean you no harm and hope you're not injured," Obi-Wan told the figure gently hoping it wouldn't start to attack them._

_Obi-Wan searched through the Force to see if the figure had any dark energy surrounding and only found that its Force aura was bathing in only the Light Side. He wondered if this person was Force sensitive._

_Finally the tall figure spoke up pulling her hood down exposing her youthful face with vibrant curly, red hair and deep emerald green eyes and spoke, "Hello to you too, my name is Melindra Vos and I can't thank you enough Knight Kenobi and Padawan Skywalker for saving our lives."_

_As Obi-Wan and the mysterious woman Melindra were talking Anakin noticed the other figure crouched behind the crate attempting to hide itself from the rest of the galaxy. He sensed it wasn't projecting any dark feelings, but he sensed heart-wrenching sadness from the figure and wondered why this figure was so sad. _

_He cautiously went over the figure hoping not to scare it and peered at the figure not being able to see its face, only darkness. When the figure noticed him it lowered its hood down revealing a site he'd never seen before. The girl hiding beneath the hood couldn't be any older then five, having curly, brown hair that was in disarray and it was her eyes that sparked his interest. They were the deepest of brown the color of chocolate, and in them it expressed fear, pain loss and most of all sadness. Anakin couldn't believe how could such a girl so young be so sad. He wondered what had happened to her that was so terrible. Her emotions hit him full on and he could feel the feelings the girl felt for some weird reason. Anakin didn't know how as he never even met this girl before, but he heard her voice in his head, "Please help me, I'm scared." _

_Anakin couldn't tear his eyes away from the girl and was reluctant to ask, but had to anyways to strike up conversation to soothe her worry._

"_Are you an angel?" _

"_What?" The girl looked at him funny with her head tilted at the side wondering what this boy was thinking._

"_You know, angels. I heard about them from deep space pilots. I think their from the Moons of Iego. They say their the most beautiful creatures in the universe," Anakin had replied as-matter-of-factly._

_The girl looked at him all funny again and then started to laugh. It made Anakin angry, but he couldn't help but feel happy that the girl was laughing. He didn't want her to worry, and he wondered again what had happened to her that could make her so sad._

"_You're a funny little boy," she laughed aloud, "My name's Padme Jinn, what's yours?"_

_Anakin replied back, "My name's Padawan Anakin Skywalker," holding his hand out as a gesture of friendship and Padme looked at him like she didn't know what to do. But Anakin saw the flash of fear in her eyes and realized that perhaps she didn't trust him, yet._

"_Well, it's a pleasure to meet you Anakin," Padme said cautiously shaking his hand, and it was at that moment they both felt that spark which made them immediately pull their hands away._

_Anakin looked away not sure what that was all about, but he it felt like a electric shock from whenever he was fixing something on his Master's Starfighter and encountered a spark from one of the wires. Anakin didn't think that was normal when you shook someone's hand, so he thought it meant something special._

_Obi-Wan and Melindra came to see Anakin and Padme, and Obi-Wan told Anakin, "Anakin it seems our friends here are quite strong with the Force and we need to go to the Council to debrief them on the situation." _

_Obi-Wan looked at Padme and thought he saw something familiar about girl. He couldn't quite place it, but he could've swore he saw her somewhere before or at least her eyes he thought. Her eyes looked so familiar, reminding him of his beloved Master Qui-Gon, but this girl's eyes reflected much fear and pain unlike his dead Master. He shaked his head out of his daydreaming and lead everyone towards the ship to go to the Council to tell all about the new discovery he made. _

_It seems as if the Confessor Order had returned and they were in the presence of the Mother Confessor herself and her would-be apprentice._

_Anakin watched as Padme and the other two walked towards the ship and he saw Padme turn around looking at him again with her big brown eyes. As he looked into her eyes he realized that there was something special about this girl and that they weren't going to be separated. Ever. This was the start of a great friendship that would lead to so much more when they got older…_

* * *

The Mother Confessor and I walked towards the grassy meadow to take a breather after they had walked around for about an hour and ended back at their ship.

"_This is useless. We're walking around a bunch of circles,"_ I angrily thought to myself brushing my Caharin braid off of my shoulder and wishing for the millionth time why we had to wear such heavy, thick robes making it impossible to breathe. My own robes consisted of dark navy blue tunics, pants and outer vest and cloak with black boots and my lightsaber hanging at my hip. Normally, Confessors didn't use lightsabers as it wasn't necessary for them and their ability to use the Force was different then the Jedi, making it impossible to keep up with the fast movements required. But some of the other Confessors and I had been specially trained to use them during the war, as a blaster couldn't always do the job.

I looked at the Mother Confessor who seemed to be sweating and panting after our lovely jog through the forest and asked her, "So what's next? We've managed to figure out we're walking around in circles and that the cannibals don't live in the forest."

"Well, then we'll have to head towards the meadows then Padme. I'm starting to…"

I worriedly look at the Mother Confessor wondering why she stopped in mid sentence when I felt it too.

Someone was watching us.

"Padme hurry, get up. We need to move. Whoever is watching us doesn't seem to be the likes of the cannibals."

With that said we both shot up and as soon as we got up a blaster fire came straight us and nearly missed the Mother Confessor's head by an inch.

The impact of the blast sent her flying and I scrambled towards her hoping she wasn't gravely injured.

"Mother Confessor are you alright?" I asked desperately.

"Yes, Padme I'm alright. We need to move quickly, I think we've been found and it doesn't look this person is up for negotiation."

I dragged the Mother Confessor as soon as I felt another blaster fire heading our way hitting the nearby tree trunk. We started to run towards the forest in hopes of losing the assassin in the thick trees. But the assassin wasn't going to let that get in the way of killing us. I looked behind me and realized the assassin was dressed in a blue and silver armor with a helmet, covering its head. It looked like someone familiar…

In my thinking another shot came towards us and it barely missed my head this time. The Mother Confessor grabbed my arm and we started to run through the thick bushes jumping any branches that came out or ducked to avoid crashing into them. I was worried that we might get lost in the forest and hoped the assassin would get lost and leave us along. Fat chance…

I kept on running behind the Mother Confessor and saw that the assassin was gaining on us and realized that we were going to have to defend ourselves. With that I stopped the Mother Confessor over to the nearest tree trunk and ducked behind a branch, igniting my lightsaber with its vibrant emerald green spilling out and started to block all the shots that came our way.

The assassin wasn't content on stopping when it saw my lightsaber, and started to shoot more blaster fire in hopes that one of them would eventually hit me. I was trying desperately to concentrate letting the Force flow through me, but that didn't work so I just used my eyes and hands as I pleased.

Boy, was that a mistake.

In losing my concentration with the Force, I let down my guard and finally the assassin shot me in my arm earning me a loud scream. I quickly ran back behind the tree trunk where the Mother Confessor was and hoped that she didn't run off to do anything heroic like last time. I saw that she wasn't there and panicked, but was put at ease when I saw her advancing towards the assassin with her own bright blue lightsaber blocking the blaster fire. I looked at my arm and realized it was a first-degree burn and wasn't anything major.

I yelled towards the Mother Confessor, "Mother Confessor! Lets run towards the end of the forest, I think we'll be able to lose him out towards the end."

The Mother Confessor ran back towards me and we both proceeded to run towards the end of the forest and I was glad that perhaps it was over. I quickly came up with a plan to jump atop one of the trees and grab a branch and fling it at the assassin and take him down with a couple of stun shots from my blaster.

As if this day couldn't get any worse I didn't hear the Mother Confessor calling my name to stop running and finally realized that I was heading off the edge of the cliff.

I wasn't fast enough to put on the brakes and felt myself slipping off the edge falling hundreds of feet towards the river below thinking how incredibly stupid I was for not paying attention, again.

Oh man, I was going to feel that one in the morning.


	11. Chapter 11

**

* * *

**

Chapter 11: Finding Her

* * *

Falling.

The puffy, white clouds did nothing to stop me from my falling descent and it seemed as if the monster-like river would devour me whole as I fell.

I desperately tried to grope my hands to grab something. Anything.

I didn't need for this to happen. I couldn't have let this happen. I was so stupid for not paying attention and if I wasn't in la-la land I could've heard the Mother Confessor yelling my name to stop. Finally, my hand grabbed a branch that stuck out at an odd angle from the side of the cliff and managed to get my bearings to try to climb back up.

I had to get up there fast. The Mother Confessor was in trouble. Whoever that was that was chasing us would love to kill the Mother Confessor. I felt a new fear reach my head when I realized that my utter stupidity might cost the Mother Confessor her life.

I shook that thought out of my head, knowing full well that the Mother Confessor was more then capable of handling herself. But what if?

I realized that my nagging feeling that I had was in high gear with the hairs on the back of my neck standing straight up, my palms had become sweaty, and arms were filled with goose bumps and that was never a good sign. I climbed up, slowly finding any crevice that I could place my hands or feet in to keep my balance and to keep myself from falling to my death in the river. I knew I should've listened to myself. Then none of this would have ever happened.

Another nagging feeling hit me when I thought about that bounty hunter. I know I saw him somewhere before, but where? That blue and silver armor with that flat helmet was so familiar. I tried hard to think of where I saw it before and couldn't come up with a reason except that perhaps I had seen it as a child when I still lived on Naboo.

When I almost made it to the top I called the Force to help me push myself up and muttered, "Great! Why do I always have to be the one doing all the stupid stuff like falling off cliffs and why does the Mother Confessor never show up to totally rescue me."

I looked around the forest and saw that it was too quiet, again. There weren't even any birds that were chirping and I couldn't see any other animals roaming around. I started to walk into the forest stepping over the large branches growing out of the ground, looking for the Mother Confessor, but there was no sign of her.

It was almost as if she was never here.

That's when I realized that was the nagging feeling that had hit me at the edge of the cliff.

The Mother Confessor was gone.

* * *

I walked back to the ship hoping that maybe the Mother Confessor had gone back to the ship after getting rid of the bounty hunter, but she wasn't there.

I walked towards the ramp of the ship, looking at the horizon and saw that the sun was at the midday mark leaving me only hours to find the Mother Confessor.

I pushed the ramp button down to lower it and as it lowered I jumped up onto it running into Artoo who started to beep madly.

"No, sorry old buddy. The Mother Confessor isn't here right now. I gotta go contact the High Council to debrief them on the situation. So get the transmission ready and insert the High Council encryption key to activate the hologram."

Artoo went towards the console getting the transmitter ready to contact someone from the High Council and the transmitter light turned green, signaling that it was able to contact someone.

I waited impatiently for the person on the other line to pick up when I was greeted with the face of Obi-Wan.

I loudly spoke, "Obi-Wan its good to see you."

Obi-Wan replied back a bit surprised, "Padme, its good to see you too. How's the mission going? Did the Mother Confessor and you find the local tribe yet?"

I swallowed hard and said, "No, umm, we didn't."

"Well, what's wrong then? Is everything alright there Padme? Are you hurt?" Obi-Wan questioned with concern lacing his voice.

"Obi-Wan I'm fine…but it's the Mother Confessor. I…I…think she's been kidnapped."

Right at that moment Anakin had to come on the hologram and asked me urgently, "Padme did you just say the Mother Confessor's been kidnapped?"

I nodded my head slowly wondering where did he come from.

"Its just as I feared. Master Yoda had warned about something happening on Icylian," Anakin replied wearily making me nervous about what he and Master Yoda had talked about.

"Well, I was calling to ask that I was going to go find the Mother Confessor and wanted to let you know just in case something happens."

Anakin quickly retorted, "NO! Padme stay right there! Don't go looking for the Mother Confessor. I'm sure she's fine, but you don't need to get kidnapped either. Uhh, Obi-Wan and I will come to Icylian and come get you both. So don't do anything, yet."

I sat there numb wondering I couldn't just sit around while Force knows where the Mother Confessor is. She could be hurt, she could be off this planet by now and taken elsewhere, or even dead…_"No don't think that Padme. Everything's gonna be alright, you'll see. The Mother Confessor isn't the leader of the Confessors for nothing." _

Obi-Wan and Anakin looked at me through the hologram waiting for my answer and I finally came to my decision, "Okay you two. I'll stay right here and not even move an inch."

I could see the sighs of relief of both of them since they both knew well that I was capable of doing incredibly unpredicted things when it came to life and death situations, much like my father.

Anakin spoke one last time, "Alright Padme, Obi-Wan and I are going to check in with the High Council and then we'll leave as soon as possible. We should be there in a few hours. Remember don't do anything rash until we get there, promise me Padme?"

"Promise, Skywalker. Just please hurry," I said making myself look desperate but secretly I was crossing my fingers behind my back.

After the transmission ended, Artoo gave me his opinion also, "Boop, beep, beep, boop-beep!"

"Geez, calm down Artoo. I was only lying to them, do you really think I'm gonna just sit here and wait for those two, the Negotiator and the Hero With No Fear to save our sorry butts again?" I asked Artoo earning me a good set of beeps instead of angry ones before.

"Besides I intend to keep my promise. I'm not going to go do anything rash, just go rescue the Mother Confessor, which technically isn't rash, but smart," I stated proud that I would be able to work around Anakin's promise.

* * *

I climbed down the ramp once again with Artoo following me and turned around telling him, "Artoo go back, I need you to stay here with the ship and wait for orders," tossing him my extra commlink.

I took a deep breath of air and submerged myself into the Force, searching for the Mother Confessor's Force signature. I met many life forms Force signatures, but I couldn't find hers.

I opened my eyes frustrated and couldn't but help to wonder where was she? I couldn't feel her Force signature that made me nervous thinking of only two possibilities: either she's dead or she used her Confessor's power.

I concluded that she probably used her power to try to stop her attacker, but still managed to get caught anyways. I snorted to myself, "Well, that's our damsel in distress alright."

As I was deeply concentrating to again find the Mother Confessor's Force signature, I felt my senses kick into high gear alerting me of the danger coming towards my way.

I barely managed to duck to the right as an arrow zipped past my head smacking into the tree behind me making a thumping noise. At that very second I held my breath frantically searching to see who tried to shoot me. Finally, I saw who was attacking me.

It was the Icylians.

About a dozen of them jumped down from the trees and locked their eyes with mine holding their spears and arrows ready to shoot me if I did anything stupid.

I stood tall and determined and tried to do some diplomacy and said, "Fellow Icylians, I come in peace and wish you no harm if you don't try to kill me like you did a minute ago."

One of the Icylians spat at my boots and gestured with his spear to follow him with his other cronies. _I thought to myself, _"_Well isn't this just a nice welcoming party."_

I decided that I needed to find the Mother Confessor not follow these maniac cannibals to Force knows where. There was no way in all that was good of the Force was I going to listen to these crazy people. So I decided to go with the only option besides my lightsaber and blaster option, as I didn't want this to be a messy affair…yet.

I nodded my head no towards the Icylian letting him know that he was gonna have to beat the living daylights outta me before I was going anywhere with them. I tried to distract them by screaming and pointing towards the meadow, which made them all turn around to see what the heck I was screaming about and I made a run for it.

I ran towards the open meadow running through the tall grass pushing the offending brown stacks aside to see ahead. I could hear the Icylians behind me shouting orders at each other, in what seemed like, to try to cut me off at the end and take me down. Well, as I said before I wasn't going down without a fight.

I felt myself running short of breath to keep ahead as the Icylians were fast runners and I had been cursed being short thanks to my mother. _"Why couldn't I be tall like my father?"_

I saw the edge of the meadow coming up and noticed that half of the cronies were already there waiting for me so I decided to turn around and wait for those behind me to come and get me.

As I turned around, I tuned myself deeply into the Force searching for the center of my power. I calmed my breathing down and focused all my attention at focusing my power to come out of my hands. I saw them coming shouting towards me thinking it had been an easy victory.

But they were sadly mistaken.

Time had slowed down at that moment and come almost to a standstill as the closest Icylian, the one who had spat at me before, running towards me with a wild gleam in his eyes.

I slowly breathed out as he came closer and closer and reached out my head to stop him dead in his tracks.

I could feel my power at my fingertips ready to come out to use against this creature.

Right when he came into contact with my hand I released my power seeing the look of shock on his face knowing full well what he was dealing with.

None of his little friends could stop me. He was mine. By the time they all would come to rescue him, he would be under my power.

My power moved faster then a thought and came out like a bolt of lightening would out of sky only there was no lightening and consumed his body.

The Icylian slowly fell to the ground and groveled at my feet looking up at me with innocent eyes letting his Mistress know that he was at her command. There was nothing no one could do to reverse the power that had been put upon him. Once a Confessor touched a person, they would forever remain under her command until she died or she commanded that person to die. They would only obey the Confessor who touched them with her power and would serve her without question only there to please their Mistress.

I wasn't about to command him to die. He was mine and would my bidding.

I was about to command him when I felt something hard hit me in the back of my head and the last thing I saw was that Icylian I took with my power looking up in fear at his fellow partner at what he had done.

Then I felt myself slipping into that dark place no one ever wants to go.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Remember Me **

* * *

Anakin and Obi-Wan stood before the High Council regarding their meeting to receive permission to travel to Icylian to rescue the Mother Confessor and Padme. Anakin felt nervous wondering if the Council would allow this or not and now knew exactly how Padme felt when she had to stand in front of all the legendary Masters and Justices. 

Anakin was afraid that Obi-Wan and he might be too late if they delay any further as the Council members were discussing the possible solutions to the problem at hand.

Finally, Master Windu spoke out, "Masters Kenobi and Skywalker you have told us that the Mother Confessor was kidnapped and her apprentice Padme reported this to you?"

"Yes, Master," Anakin said for the umpteenth time feeling frustrated that they were being held up and the longer they waited the more in danger he could feel Padme getting in.

"Yes, Master Windu, but don't you think this is dangerous? Masters Kenobi and Skywalker are needed here and could be deported anytime to the Outer Rim. I'm sure Caharin Jinn was over exaggerating when she told you the Mother Confessor was kidnapped," Master Olin countered back.

Anakin's blue eyes turned a dark shade of gray glaring at Ferus Olin and were practically shooting daggers through him. He didn't like Olin, not one bit.

Anakin turned his icy blue eyes away from Master Olin and addressed the Council, "My fellow Council members, it is imperative that we find the Mother Confessor and her apprentice as they are important in our cause. Master Olin's disregard for other life is thoroughly disgusting and just goes to show how deeply his hatred runs. And here I thought that Jedi shall not know hatred, isn't that right Master Olin?"

Master Olin turned a bright red, now the one shooting daggers at Anakin's form.

Master Yoda who had been quiet the entire time finally gave his word, "Speak I will with Master Olin at a later time. But important it is to find the Mother Confessor and her apprentice it is."

The Council members all looked at each other and nodded their confirmation and Master Yoda replied, "Give you permission the Council does to rescue the Mother Confessor and her apprentice."

Both Jedi Masters sighed relieved knowing full well that they could count on Master Yoda to sway the vote in their favor.

"Dismissed you are now. Go and find them you must," Master Yoda replied.

* * *

Both Anakin and Obi-Wan walked outside to the docking bay and prepared their starfighters and their droids. Anakin was busy trying to put finishing touches on the hyperdrive leak, while Obi-Wan was standing next to him handing the wrench. 

Obi-Wan broke the silence sensing his former Padawan's troubling mind and said, "Don't worry Anakin we'll find them. The Mother Confessor might have been kidnapped, but she won't let anything happen to her until the time is right. And as for Padme, she's a resourceful girl and will figure out a way to get out of the situation.

Anakin sighed heavily, "You're right. I know Padme won't do anything stupid, she'll wait for us and then we'll go and find those two."

"She reminds of Qui-Gon in so many ways," Obi-Wan spoke softly remembering back when his former Master had been alive and then suddenly hearing of his death at the hands of the Sith. They had been a perfect team much like Anakin and he were now, and had defeated Darth Maul together. Little did he know it was to be a bittersweet victory and Qui-Gon would lose his life in an all too short five years. Sometimes he wondered what went wrong and why he couldn't sense that Qui-Gon had loved. Had his former Master not trusted him enough to let him on his secret? Sometimes when he looked at Padme he could Qui-Gon's eyes in her and it made him want to look away in pain knowing that Padme was a living reminder of his late Master. _"Master I wish you here right now and could help us to stop this evil."_

But wishful thinking wouldn't bring Qui-Gon back. The only thing Obi-Wan and Anakin could rely on now was hope.

* * *

Darkness. 

It was everywhere and it seemed to want to control me. It called to me to embrace it, to let the pain control me. But I didn't want it to control me. I wanted to be free of it.

I opened my groggy chocolate eyes, wondering what had last happened, when I last remembered that the Icylians had been chasing me and had managed to knock me out unconscious. I saw that Force binders bound my hands and feet and I was tied up in a chair.

I looked around in the lightly dimmed room, which was quite spacious with only the barest of furnitures; there was a worktable and a few chairs scattered around the room. My eyes then settled on the far wall and I gasped looking at the things hanging off of it.

It was various torture devices.

I surveyed my surroundings some more and saw the Mother Confessor was also tied to a chair with Force binders. She looked beaten up pretty badly with her head hanging down and I frantically shouted, "Mother Confessor! Are you alright?"

She looked up at me and smiled slightly responding, "Yes, I'm fine Padme. Are you all right? I was beginning to wonder when you would wake up."

"Yeah, I'm alright. Mother Confessor where the heck are we?"

A deep, masculine voice answered my question, "Well, it seems the little Confessor is awake, eh? You're on Icylian in my secret hideout."

I perked my ears so that I could try to decipher the voice that I had just heard. I knew I had heard that voice somewhere before. But where? Who was this man and what did he want with us? My conscious told me that I should know this voice anywhere, but for some reason I couldn't figure out who it belonged to even though I knew I heard it before.

"Who are you? What do you want with us?" I questioned our masked kidnapper.

Then he stepped out of the shadows and it felt like my worst nightmare was coming true.

No! It couldn't be him! After all these years, I had prayed that I would never have to see his face again and relive the horrors of my past. I suddenly felt a wave of nausea hit me as I was transported back to a time sixteen years when I had first met him…

_I was playing in the fields in the backyard of our Mountain Country home as it was a beautiful spring day with all the birds chirping and the shaaks were grazing in the meadows. The flowers were starting to bloom and I was picking some of my favorite flowers, lotus flowers, for my mother. _

_I heard my mother calling me to come inside to eat lunch even though it was quite early before my grandparents came home from their trip to the Theed market. I skipped all the way in to the house carrying my lotus flowers for my mother and presented them to her, "Here you go mommy. I picked this flowers just for you."_

"_Why thank you my sweet little girl. Do you know that your father named you after these flowers?" My mother asked me._

_I shaked my head no laughing that I was named after such a pretty flower and replied, "But mommy I don't look like a flower so why did daddy name me after it?"_

_My mother laughed quietly, "Well, sweetheart you don't have to look like a flower to be named after it. It was just that the lotus flowers had just bloomed and it was the first thing your daddy saw and decided that it was something good as they bloom for eternity so he named you after it."_

_I nodded my head not quite understanding for a five-year-old and went to wash my hands when the sound of the doorbell shrieking was heard in the background._

_My mother went to the door to answer it and was met by some strange looking man who was wearing some horrible looking costume that consumed his entire body and I couldn't even see his face._

_His armor was blue and white and carried a variety of weapons. _

_I might have been only a child, but I knew who he was._

_He was a bounty hunter. _

_And we were about to become the hunted._

_My mother screamed when he pulled out his blaster and motioned for her to follow him and she turned around screaming at me, "Padme run! Hide somewhere!"_

_I ran as fast as my short legs would carry me with my short brown curls bouncing on my shoulders towards the living room and quickly hid underneath the table._

_I heard the man's horrible voice. It sounded like a droid's and he looked like one too only he was bigger and much more experienced. I saw my mother coming into the living room with the bounty hunter in tow nervously wringing her hands together._

_The bounty hunter took out his blaster and aimed it at my mother's head._

_I gasped thinking these kinds of things on happened on holos and not in real life, but here it was happening._

_The bounty hunter angrily shouted, "Tell me where the hidden plans are! I want to know where your Jedi husband hid them!"_

_My mother sobbed quietly and replied, " I don't know what you're talking about! Please just leave us be!"_

"_Listen lady, you better tell me now or I blow your head off!" He threatened._

"_Go ahead, but you'll never get anything out of me! I don't know anything about what you're looking for," She calmly replied._

"_Well, then I guess this is the end of your life then isn't it lady? You're a fool for trying to protect the Jedi secrets," The bounty hunter growled._

_I watched in horror as the mysterious bounty hunter loaded his blaster as my mother bravely stood up tall and unafraid. _

_Her eyes betrayed no emotion._

_I realized at that moment that she was going to die._

_As I was contemplating this I saw my mother leap away and jumped around the couch to hide as the blaster fire nearly missed her. She got out and took a lamp from the coffee table and tried to deflect the shots that were rapidly fired in her direction and managed to get close enough to the bounty hunter that she grabbed his hand to throw the blaster out of it._

_It then became a bitter struggle between the two as one fought to do his job, while the other fought to protect me._

_The two fell to the floor as my mother grabbed the lamp and hit his hand knocking the blaster far away and she tried to choke him with it. The bounty hunter was too strong and managed to throw my mother off and both raced towards the blaster._

_It was a race against time to see who would get it first and whoever did would live._

_The bounty hunter was faster and tripped my mother and with lightening speed grabbed the blaster, turned around, and fired two shots._

_That's when I heard myself screaming seeing my mother slowly fall to the ground clutching her chest._

_The bounty hunter laughed, "Well, it seems that you won't tell me the hidden plans now will you?"_

"_So it looks like you'll have to die as I can't let anyone else know now can I?" He mocked._

_The bounty hunter laughed again and started to leave and I could hear the front door shutting closed and that's when I crawled out from under the table._

_I slowly crawled towards my mother as I could hear her breathing becoming faster as she fought to get the precious oxygen into her lungs. I could see her blood seeping through the carpet as it created a red stain that I realized would never fade and last forever._

_I quietly whispered, "Mommy? Mommy? Are you alright?"_

_My mother looked towards me opening her brown eyes and smiled slightly, "Yes, Padme love I think I'll be alright. Don't worry everything's going to be okay."_

_I knew that my mother was lying at that point because I could feel it through the Force even though I had no formal training. _

_I could feel her pain._

_I could feel her fear._

_I could feel that she was going to die._

_I held my mother's head in my lap as I looked down at her as her blood started to stain my dress, my hands, and my legs. I held her in my arms for I don't know how long, but I felt that time was stopping and that I was being given a few more precious moments before my mother would slip into the netherworld of the Force where my father awaited her. I started to cry knowing that this was it that it was really the end and I told myself that I wouldn't cry I would be strong for my mother._

_But I couldn't hold back the tears that threatened to spill out of my brown eyes. I looked down at her eyes and saw tears forming too sliding sideways towards her ears._

"_Don't cry my sweet child. Shh…everything will soon be…set…straight…" She gasped as my mother was fighting for her life._

"_No mama! Please don't leave me! I'm scared; I don't want to face the bad thing. He hurt you and papa!" I wailed letting my tears flow freely down my chubby face._

"_No mama don't leave me…don't leave. I need you here. I need you to help me, I don't know how to stop this, make it stop, please please…"_

"_Let me go my sweet angel, let me go…only then I'll be able to leave this place and be with your father. Just let go and everything will be alright…remember that I… will watch over you no matter what… and also… remember… to fulfill your destiny. I see great things for you young one…one day you'll make your father and I very proud. I love… "_

"_NOOOO! Mama come back! I love you, please don't leave me by myself! I can't do this, please come back…please, please…"_

_I watched as she slipped away from me, out of my reach. _

_At that moment my grandparents came rushing through the house tearing it down and saw my mother's body on the carpet in my bloody lap._

_I looked up at them with wide eyes not being able to believe what had just happened._

_Then it was all a blur as my grandfather picked my mother up and carried her to the speeder rushing her to the nearest med center. I don't remember much after that as I was in a deep trance from the shock of losing my mother._

_My grandmother had called the Mother Confessor letting her know of what had happened and she quickly came over within hours from her latest mission on the Nubian moon of Bilia._

_When she walked in through the door with my grandfather I knew that nothing could be done. I was still sitting on the floor of the living room on the same carpet where the horrible assassination occurred with my blood-splattered clothes still on. _

_I must've looked a mess to the Mother Confessor as she gently kneeled towards me with my grandparents watching on. _

_The first thing she said was ever so softly, "I'm so, so sorry Padme. You're mother's gone, Padme, accept it."_

_I looked up at her disgusted that she could say such a thing to me and looked away not knowing what to say. What was I supposed to say? Nothing was left to say anymore._

_I didn't sleep that night as I saw a new day had dawned._

_The sun rose the same way it always did on Naboo with the sun peaking through the mountains and gradually embracing the entire planet with its warmth._

_And it almost, almost seemed like that tragedy had never even happened. _

_But it did._

_I was numb still and my grandmother had forced me to bathe, dress properly, and eat something before we attended my mother's funeral._

_My mother's funeral._

_I had never thought in my wildest dreams that this was the way it was going to end._

_She wasn't supposed to die this way; no one deserved to die this way._

_No child should ever have to watch their parents die as I had to._

_I quietly sat in the armchair dressed in a long-sleeved and knee length black tunic, loose, baggy fitting black pants that flared and cuffed towards the bottom, a black scarf tied around my shoulders covering my head, and black shoes._

_I heard the Mother Confessor and my grandmother calling me to ride to the Mountain Country Cemetery where my mother would be buried next to my father for all eternity._

_When we got there, the holy man was already there waiting for us, smiling in kind towards me to start the procession._

_I stood there numb, staring at my mother's beautiful face that only yesterday had been laughing and smiling with me when we were in the meadow picking flowers._

_Small lotus flowers adorned her chocolate curls that cascaded around her face in a circular path._

_I didn't hear the holy man recite the prayers of goodwill only able to stare at my mother's face hoping she'd wake up any moment now and we could go home. This was all too much for a five-year-old to take in and I promised myself that I wouldn't cry. _

_I found that amazingly easy to do as all the tears I had shed had made me eyes run dry. I was thankful for that for I might of started bawling and not being able to stop._

_I felt the hand of the Mother Confessor on my shoulder as the two men who had accompanied the holy man close the top of the casket to prepare her burial._

_I looked one last time at my mother knowing that this would indeed be the last time I looked upon her face in the living galaxy. _

_I would never hear my mother's voice, or see her smile, or watch her eyes twinkle with happiness._

_The casket top closed and the men lowered her into the ground and started to bury the dirt on to of her. _

_That's when I felt my heart breaking. _

_It felt like someone had stabbed me a thousand times as I watched my mother being lowered, helplessly wanting to cry out to stop, stop now, and come back._

_But she wasn't going to come back, ever._

_I didn't understand at that time why fate had been so cruel to me. First my father had died at the hands of Count Dooku in my arms and now three months later when we all were still trying to heal the wounds of my father's death, my mother was dead. The wounds had been reopened again and it felt as if they would never close, and I would bleed every drop of blood until it amounted to the amount my mother had bled._

_I hated this, I hated my life, I hated fate. I hated the galaxy that I had been left an orphan and now had nowhere to go. Life wasn't fair because it wasn't supposed to happen. Why did it happen to me? What wrongs had I committed that made my mama go away? Now I had lost her too after I promised my father that I would take care of her._

_I failed her just as I failed my father. _

_I was a failure. I guess this was meant to happen. I probably deserved this punishment for my faults, but I wished that fate hadn't punished my parents._

_I hadn't felt this overwhelming sadness at my father's funeral making me feel guilty. But that was because I hadn't known him as well as I had known my mother. My father was always away on Coruscant training Anakin and not to arouse any suspicion that he had broken the code. But my mother was special as she taught me so much and most importantly loved me. She never let me be deprived of my father's love as she had more then enough to make up for it. _

_I couldn't save her anymore then I could've saved my father._

_She was truly gone and I was truly left alone in this galaxy with a war in the horizon._

_I looked up at the Mother Confessor as we watched the burial and asked her, "What's gonna happen to me now?"_

_She turned her head towards me with glossy eyes and replied back, "You will become a Confessor. I promise."_


End file.
